is it just me… or is everyone getting married these days?
longevity and durability
there should be an instructions manual.
also, Man and Woman have German accents because they are from Germany.
me: I’m 24-years-old; I have a lot of life ahead of me.
Man: Wait. You’re telling me that I am 55 years older than you?
me: No way! You do not look like you’re 79!
Man: I am and my wife is going to make me hate it next year.
Woman: He turns 80 next year and I am going to laugh at him. I have known him for 54 years. We have been married for 53 years.
me: What! That’s amazing! Wow! I really hope that I can have something like that.
Man: People around your age and in these years seem to not last very long.
me: Yeah, it’s rare to hear stories about marriages lasting for long.
Woman: It was very different to get married back then.
Man: Yeah, back then, when people got married, they didn’t have stuff. They accumulated as they grew older. Now, people have stuff. Too much stuff—TV, computers, furniture and other things.
me: Yeah, it’s true.
Woman: Yeah, even furniture back then lasted long. You could buy a sofa and it would last you 30 years. Now, furniture is not so good.
Man: Marriage now is like Ikea furniture: cheap to buy, easy to build, falls apart fast!
all the single ladies
me: I asked them about how he proposed [and he said that] to afford/buy the engagement ring, he sold his Magic cards.
WL: If I sold my Magic cards, I would only get $100—not really the greatest ring.
me: … So geeky, but sooooooo cute!
WL: That’s cute?
me: Yes! It’s so sweet! He sold his hobby to buy his woman a ring!
WL: “Nerdy” sure is in this year.
me: What would you sell for your woman? I’d sell my soul, but that wouldn’t be worth enough.
WL: You don’t buy the rings, silly.
me: What? Do you steal them? Make them? Go to Mordor and stop Frodo?
WL: The girl does not buy the ring…
WL: … Is what I meant.
me: Why can’t I propose? So traditional of you.
WL: You can… Weirdo.
me: I have a feeling that I’d do the proposing.
WL: Ask him to give you his penis.
me: And put a cock ring on it?